what my sister said yesterday makes me keep wondering if i'd stolen something from my son's life. her friend asked, "is this the life style of every modern family?" well, for me, it has nothing to do with modernism at all. with this hectic schedule, the nausea and other things that keep me laying down at home, i know there are a lot of things my son missed. sometimes i can't help crying when i see him asleep; i just feel so guilty. he needs more than i can give, but what can i do? i've been very weak for the last few weeks. i can't even stand up for more than 3 minutes. last night was one of the worst. we both went to bed without brushing our teeth (jorok pollll). he had dinner with the carpenter as if i couldn't afford to buy him one (sorry dear, i thought u ate twice at school). god, this is terrible. please help me... find me an assistant to take care of the house and my son. has every good servant been taken that none is left for me...?
